


Paradise Marred

by Omoni



Series: Abovetale [5]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alphys/Undyne-centric, Established Alphys/Undyne, F/F, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-19
Packaged: 2018-05-27 08:55:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6277960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Omoni/pseuds/Omoni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After several years following the breaking of the barrier, after years of relative peace and generic harmony, that kind of peace is broken easily after one solid blow.</p><p>Definitely Alphys/Undyne centric, but also focusses on the many friendships around everyone. It directly follows after my previous fic, 'Better Than Fanfiction', so if you haven't read that one, much of this will go over your head. </p><p>There are TRIGGER WARNINGS however, for:<br/>Violence (non-graphic)<br/>PTSD<br/>Homophobia</p><p>So please remember that when reading.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this takes place about four-five years since the barrier broke. When it comes to things like this, if I do continued universe stories, I try to stay as true to reality as well as to the source material. I have hinted the troubles that our lovely monsters have had to face just to live where they want and be who they are, but never have I actually shown it, nor the consequences. Well, this is a story in which I show it. To be blunt, this was hard to write, but for whatever reason, I had to write it. It’s like one of those things you need to scratch at even if it’s unpleasant. So I totally understand if I get flak for this. However, I’ve chosen to share it for the reasons above, but also because, well, stuff like this happens every day, and we’re all humans. I think that’s the most important thing to remember. Please keep in mind the following trigger warnings: violence (non-graphic), PTSD, and homophobia, as well as talk of past suicide attempts and the like. Thanks for taking the time to read this, if not the story.

"There are a lot of Floweys out there," Frisk said once, their eyes dark, sounding as if they were quoting someone else. But the honesty and sadness found in their face meant that they, personally, knew it to be true.

 And soon, so did Alphys and Undyne.

* * *

They had been walking home as usual, after enjoying a wonderful night on the town. They'd seen a silly human movie with Papyrus, already forgetting the title the moment they'd left, and the three had been laughing at the parts with the "monsters"; just humans in bad make-up.

 "I wonder if it was a propaganda film," Alphys said, nibbling on a claw thoughtfully.

 Papyrus shook his head. "OF COURSE NOT. IT WAS OLD. CLEARLY THEY JUST WANTED TO SCARE EVERYONE."

 Undyne laughed happily at this. "How do they expect to get scared from each other?! That makes no sense to me."

 "Well," Alphys had to admit. "The make-up was quite good."

 " _Please,"_ Undyne snorted.

"I MUST SIDE WITH UNDYNE," Papyrus said rather predictably. "THOSE SKELETONS? ABSOLUTELY INSULTING. ALL THEY DID WAS PAINT THE BONES ON BLACK CLOTHES! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, MUST NOW BECOME AN ACTOR AND SHOW THEM HOW IT'S DONE! NYEH-HEH-HEH-HEH!"

 Undyne punched him, and he pretended to fall over in agony, despite laughing. "Wanna come over for a bit, dear thespian?" she wondered, as he got back to his feet.

 Alphys nodded in agreement. "Yes, you can show me how you're doing with today's Jumble."

 Papyrus sighed. "ALAS, IT IS ONCE AGAIN MY BETTER."

 "Even with the tricks I showed you?"

 "SADLY. NYOO-HOO-HOO...."

  _"Hey!"_

 The three turned abruptly, blinking through the dim light of evening, and saw a group of humans coming toward them.

Thinking them to be neighbours, Alphys waved with a smile, but was not greeted back, which puzzled her and made that smile waver.

 Undyne felt adrenaline fill her all of a sudden. She eyed the group and saw nothing but trouble. "Alphy," she said softly; Alphys was standing right in front of her, refusing to move.

 "It's okay," her wife replied, waving again as the group came closer. "They're probably just from around here. Hello!"

 " _Alphy_ ," Undyne growled, panic making her angry. She could see how they looked at them, see the intent in their eyes, and felt danger, something she hadn't felt in a long time since leaving the Underground.

Papyrus stood behind Undyne, just to her left. She could feel him already summoning up his power, his bony body rigid with concentration. Even _he_ knew something was off.

 When the two groups met, Alphys smiled warmly, waving again and holding out her hand. "Hello! E-er, we live... j-just down a few b-blocks..." she stammered, noticing that, while her smile was returned, the versions she received were not kind. "I-I'm A-Alphys..."

 The lead human of the group of five reached forward and slapped her hand away. Before Undyne or Papyrus could even react, they then slapped _Alphys_.

Or perhaps ‘punched’ is a better word. The hit knocked her to the ground, hard, and they heard a sickening crack, like bone hitting rock.

 Hot rage consumed Undyne then, so hot it was physical. At once, she had a spear in each hand, the blue glow almost blinding her.

 Alphys was on the ground, her hand to her cheek, in shock and tasting blood. Her whole body shook, but still she stayed there, eyes wide and confused, her smile long gone and replaced with trembling lips.

 "We _know_ who you are," said the human leader. _"What_ you are. You, the two _dykes_ married despite no one _wanting_ you to! And that bony bastard behind you, your _beard._ You _monsters_..." And they spat, right at Alphys, though thankfully they missed. "Taking over. Taking homes, jobs, _everything--,"_

 A blue spear landed at the leader's feet, causing the entire group to jump back and mutter about magic, effectively distracting them and keeping them away for the moment.

Undyne then took advantage of their distraction and  knelt down, at her wife's side, kneeling beside her and helping her sit up.

Alphys was crying, but she didn't know it, couldn't feel it. She looked up at Undyne and whispered, bewildered, "I-I'm s- _sorry_... _g-go,_ Un-Undyne... _r-run..."_

 "Get help," Undyne snarled at Papyrus. "I think she hit her head. Dad isn't far from here; go get him!"

 Papyrus hesitated. There was a rare expression there, one full of anger and the need for revenge, for his best friends, for his people, for their _right_ to be there.

He held up a long, glowing blue bone, looking ready to ignore her, but Undyne snapped out, _"Now, Papyrus!_ _Get help!"_

He looked at her, still unwilling to disobey orders from his former leader, before he turned and ran toward New New Home, his cell phone out already.

 "Alphy?" Undyne shook her gently. Her eyes were weird, like they kept rolling upwards a bit, before closing. _"No!"_ Undyne tapped her cheek, and her eyes opened. She had trained enough guards to know a concussion when she saw one.

 _That human must have hit_ hard _,_ she thought, fury flashing through her.

 When the spear vanished with those thoughts, the humans came forward again. Undyne glared at them, baring her teeth and holding out a hand, another spear flashing to life.

 _"Get the fuck back!"_  she warned. "Or I will _not_ hesitate. You think me _a monster?"_ She laughed, part-hysterical, part-enraged. "I'll _give_ you one. Just take one more step forward."

 They did. But before Undyne could attack, one of them slipped past her and attacked Alphys instead,  catching Undyne off guard and landing a kick swift enough to not only rip her from Undyne's arms with a cry, but enough to bring her back down to the ground hard.

 Where she went still.

 Undyne lost her mind, then.

There was no other way to describe it. There was no other way to explain it. Seeing her wife, on the ground, not moving, she feared the worst.

She knew Alphys was strong, yes, but not as a warrior, not against these kinds of attacks.

With a scream, Undyne lunged forward, seeing nothing but the red of her rage and the blue of her spears. The humans froze from shock at the sight of her fury, and she grinned - and attacked. 

She didn't know how long she had been fighting them, but she came back to herself the moment she felt Asgore's strong arms pull hers back behind her.

She screamed again, her left eyepatch almost igniting, and she kicked, her feet only hitting empty air, trying to get free, though now she didn't remember why – only that Alphys was...

_Alphys was..._

She knew it was Asgore, because he was the only one capable of holding her back.

" _Undyne! Undyne, stop! Undyne!!"_

He kept shouting her name, over and over, but by now she was scream-crying, trying so hard to get to the human who may have killed her wife, in order to flay them, to destroy them, to devour them, their pathetic souls, not even worthy of them...

  _"UNDYNE!"_ That was Papyrus. "UNDYNE, STOP! _STOP!"_ And she felt his hands on her, too, gentle but also firm, so like him.

She screamed again, this time Alphys's name, and she stopped fighting, letting her sobs take over. Asgore kept hold of her, even as her whole body shook with her tears.

 Toriel was, during this, kneeling beside Alphys, who was paler than she had ever seen her. When she tried to heal her, her magic kept slipping off, so she knew this wasn't something she could help with. (Toriel's magic usually only healed wounds caused by magic.)

For years, she had been studying the kinds of medical tools that humans used, and with them, she checked Alphys's eyes ( bloodshot and rolled up), her pulse ( fast, too fast, and struggling), and her complexion (bloodless).

When Toriel tried to wake her up, Alphys groaned, but didn’t open her eyes.

 "She needs a hospital, Gorey," Toriel said calmly. _"Now."_

 Undyne heard this and sobbed, going to the ground and crumpling, still fearing the worst.

By now, at the sight of Asgore, the humans had run, knowing him and his past.

Undyne had managed to hurt a few of them, but not the way they had hurt her wife.

 Asgore went to Toriel's side, and Papyrus to Undyne. She lunged for him, hugging him so hard he coughed a bit, but he still held her as she sobbed her grief out to him.

 "UNDYNE," Papyrus tried to tell her. _"UNDYNE,_ SHE'S OKAY. _SHE'S OKAY."_

Undyne heard him, but she was unable to believe him. She was too terrified. 

 Asgore stood up, holding Alphys in his arms. "This seems familiar," he tried to joke. "And to think, I never thought I'd do this again."

 "Cut the cuteness," Toriel snapped. "We need to go _, now!"_

 "Al-Alphy...?" Undyne finally looked up and saw her wife cradled gently in Asgore's arms. She got to her feet and was at his side, even as he walked quickly.

When he somehow outpaced her (she didn't realise that she staggered as she walked), Toriel close beside him, she dropped again, unable to help it.

Papyrus helped her to her feet. Quickly, he brought he over to the Dreemurrs' car, and she climbed into it, numb at first - until she saw her wife was already there. 

With a choked sob, Undyne moved over to Alphys and pulled her right into her lap, holding her as close to her as possible, making sure she was gentle. Alphys rested limply against her, still knocked out, and Undyne kept her steady - and made sure she kept breathing - for the entire drive.

* * *

There were only a few hospitals that served just monsters, instead of a mix that was the norm after almost five years of integration. Toriel insisted rather fiercely that they go to one of the monster-exclusive ones, and no one disagreed, despite the extra time it took.

 None of them wanted to trust a human right now.

 Once there and in one of the triage rooms, waiting to be taken in for tests, Alphys was coming to, with help, looking confused and pale - and small, especially on the cot she rested on.

She murmured, "I d-don't... g-get it..."

 Undyne was at her side, holding her hand between both of hers, trying not to cry; she knew Alphys needed her to be strong. "You, not get something? You must be really hurt!" she teased, though her heart wasn't in it.

 "W-why did t-they...?" Her eyes slid to the side and closed, and instantly Toriel was tapping her cheek to get her awake again, which worked. "...h-hurt me? J-just..." Her eyes filled with tears, prismed by her broken lenses. "...wanted... to… friends... save…"

 "YOU _HAVE_ FRIENDS!" Papyrus broke in. "YOU HAVE _US!_ YOU ALWAYS WILL!"

 When Alphys closed her eyes again, it took longer to wake her. "S-stop," she begged weakly, her hand limp between Undyne's. "Wanna... s-sleep... Pl-please...?"

 " _No_ ," Undyne snapped, hoping her tone would be enough. "Stay awake, or _I will kill you."_

 The tears ran down Alphys's cheeks, now. "Sh-should h-have... r- _run_ , U-Undyne... G-giving you t-time to run away... safely..."

 Undyne opened her mouth in shock, trying to think of how to reply, when they were interrupted. It was time for Alphys's tests.

* * *

"What did she mean by that?"

 They were now in the waiting room. Papyrus, Toriel and Asgore turned to Undyne, who was hunched over in her chair, her face covered by her hands, when she said this.

 "Mean by what, my dear?" Toriel asked, placing a hand on her shoulder gently.

 "Giving me time to run away, safely," Undyne answered, raising her head.

 Asgore looked away, but Undyne saw it, and she glared at him, demanding an answer.

He coughed, then said, "It should be obvious, Undyne."

 She went cold. When put that way, it was, and it chilled her.

 Papyrus placed a hand on her other shoulder gently. "I THINK KING GROUNDSKEEPER IS READING TOO MUCH INTO IT. I THINK SHE WAS JUST CONFUSED."

 Asgore turned to him and shot him a rare look, one that spoke of battles won and reasons not to cross him. "No," he answered sharply. "I've known Alphys longer than both of you combined. She wanted you to run, Undyne."

 Undyne stared at him. "But she acted like she had no idea what was happening, why they didn't want to be friendly."

 "Which I imagine is true - at first" he replied. "But the moment she knew you were in trouble... I know she wanted to save you more."

 Toriel nodded slowly, her eyes bright. "This is the same monster who kept years of research to herself, shouldering the burden of all of it all alone."

 "BUT YOU HEARD WHAT SHE SAID!" Papyrus disagreed. "SHE SAID SHE THOUGHT THEY WANTED TO BE FRIENDS."

 Asgore and Toriel exchanged worried looks.

"You need to have a long talk with Alphys, Undyne," Toriel said softly. "This kind of thing is something we've seen before, and... it doesn't end well."

 Undyne covered her face. She knew exactly what - and whom - they meant.

* * *

Alphys spent a week in the hospital.

She hated it. It reminded her too much of that day at the abyss, when she had almost killed herself and had to spend time in the castle infirmary with a fever. Added to that, they wouldn't let her sleep for the entire night; they kept giving her adrenaline magic to keep her conscious, which made her heart race and her whole body sweat. Even during the tests she was angry, tired, and she wanted nothing more than to go home and forget this whole thing had happened.

 Because she knew it was her fault.

She had done it to herself. She had answered them back, and when she knew they were trouble, she let them hurt her anyway.

And for _nothing_ ; Undyne hadn't run, hadn't gone for safety. She had stayed with _her_. And Alphys hated herself for it.

_Undyne could have gotten hurt, could have gotten killed…_

 She didn't remember too much after they had kicked her, though. She just remembered screams - her wife's, and the humans - buried beneath a haze of grey and confusion. Her side and head had hurt so much, and she knew she was weeping, but she couldn't stay awake too long, though she knew she should.

Then, she'd blacked out, even when she'd struggled not to, and woke up only when they'd made it to the hospital - and that was through medical intervention, alone.

When they came back, the tests showed what she already knew: a mild concussion and cracked ribs. Once they _finally_ let her sleep, just as morning was breaking, she slept like the dead, for a day and a half, as her friends – family, really – watched over her.

Undyne stayed at her side, not moving save to use the washroom or pace. Once or twice, Alphys muttered in her drug-induced sleep, and Undyne could only hear the words, _"run away,"_ and _"please, not you, too."_ She didn't understand any of it, which only angered her more.

 Undyne wanted to _kill_ those humans.

She hadn't felt that emotion in a long, long time; that bloodlust for humans, the need to hurt them, to spear them, to laugh as they bled before her and begged for mercy. She was so sure she had buried it deep within the Underground, once she had left it for good, but now... _but now..._

Now she knew. When it came to Alphys, to her safety and her health, she would kill anyone who tried to hurt her wife.

And it made her feel sick inside.

* * *

 On the second day, Alphys woke up to see golden flowers, and she felt a chill of foreboding for a moment, as if thrown back in time.

She stared at them, vision hazy from lack of glasses (Undyne had grabbed them and sent them to be repaired as she slept, then brought her spare pair to the hospital for her), but knowing what they were without a doubt.

She tried to move, but found her body was made of lead, and she shut her eyes again, trying to will feeling back into them. No such luck. Well, at least she was on her side, which meant no danger of choking to death.

 A hand touched her forehead, and she opened her eyes again, recognising that touch. "T-Tori...el," she rasped out weakly, her voice sounding like gravel raked over more gravel.

As a sort of reward, she felt a straw go to her lips, and she drank; it was a sickly sweet liquid, one that almost made her gag at first, except that her body seemed to love it.

Carefully, so she wouldn't puke on her boss, she sipped it, Toriel keeping her hand on her forehead as she did so. It was oddly soothing, vague memories of a mother long gone echoing within her, and she let herself take it all in, closing her eyes but still drinking.

 When it was empty, Toriel took it away, but not her hand. Alphys opened her eyes slowly, trying to focus, only remembering again that her glasses were broken - again - and she couldn't focus to well.

"Un...dyne...?" she whispered, and Toriel's face was kind. She looked behind her, and curled up in one of the chairs was her wife, sleeping fitfully, looking exhausted even sleeping - a drugged sleep, Toriel admitted.

Alphys started to weep, and Toriel gently wiped the tears away. "S-safe?" she added, her whisper choked.

 "Thanks to you, dear," Toriel replied.

 Alphys closed her eyes and sobbed, wishing she could move, wondering why she couldn't, save her hands and forearms, but even they felt numb. Toriel gently stroked her forehead as she cried, her face gentle and her words soothing. Toriel was a true mother, and an even greater friend.

 She ended up crying herself back to sleep, and Toriel spoke to the doctor supervising her, reporting that she had drank the entire cup of electrolyte juice, which earned her a smile.

When she reported that Alphys was still semi-paralysed, she was assured it wasn't permanent, just a side-effect of the medication and the injuries. With a promise to watch over Undyne as well, the doctor told Toriel to get something to eat, which she did.

 Asgore and Frisk were waiting for her. "Mami?" Frisk asked gently, and Toriel smiled.

 "She drank it," she reported. "She'll be okay."

 Frisk hugged her at once, and Asgore did the same, hugging them both. Frisk reached Toriel's chin now, so she placed her cheek upon Frisk's head and sighed deeply, letting her tears fall.

She knew not all humans were like this, had seen it over the course of many years, but to suddenly come face-to-face with the deepest fear they all carried - and have it happen to their weakest family member - hurt a great deal.

Papyrus, it must be noted, had gone home to "tell sans", which they all knew meant cry for a while. That was fine, and understandable, really. 

When sans did find out, his eyes were dark pits for hours, comforting his brother with thoughts far, far away.

* * *

"Hey, sweetie..."

 Alphys slowly opened her eyes to this, the words the only indication that she was awake again. Sitting beside her on her scratchy hospital cot was Undyne, who looked exhausted but otherwise safe.

Alphys stared at her, her lips quivering, and wordlessly, Undyne leaned down and gave her as gentle a hug as she could.

Alphys was shocked by the pain such a small gesture gave her, and had to bite her lip to keep from making a noise, though she did inhale sharply. Carefully, she reached up with her lead-like arms and hugged Undyne back, wondering how many tears a monster could shed before they dried right up.

 For a long time, they sat like that, weeping softly, shaking, not wanting to voice the fears they both felt so deeply: Undyne's murderous revenge fantasies, Alphys's terror at having to watch Undyne die helplessly. They didn't have to voice them because they both already knew.

 "U-Undyne," Alphys choked out. When she received a kiss atop her head, she went on. "I-I think I... want to learn."

 "Learn what, Alphy?"

 "T-to fight."

 Undyne went rigid in her arms, but she didn't let go. To be honest, she was shocked, but not for the reasons Alphys at first thought. "You do?"

 "Y-yes. I-I never want to p-put you in danger, e-ever again..."

 Undyne gritted her teeth, swallowing back a sob that would have been an echo of this sentiment.

Instead, she said, echoing words she had been told by Asgore years ago, "Enough to look that danger in the eye, and laugh? Enough to know that you may also never need to use the skills given to you?"

 Alphys was quiet for a moment, clearly thinking. Then, she looked up at Undyne with wet but blazing eyes, eyes that spoke of love and need, of anger but also of survival, the need to defend those she loved most.

"Yes," she said clearly, with no hesitation or stammering.

 "Then I'll teach you," Undyne said slowly, her heart racing at seeing this side of Alphys. She was seeing something she had never seen in her before: a fighter. "When you're healed, I'll teach you. We'll find you a good weapon—,"

 "Hammer or staff."

 Undyne blinked. "Hammer? Staff?"

 Alphys nodded. "I don't want to _kill_ , just get people away. Hammers and staffs can kill, but not as easily as spears or swords."

 Undyne stared at her, then gently kissed her lips. "You've had this on your mind for a while, haven't you?"

 Alphys's eyes went dark. "As soon as they kicked me down."


	2. Chapter 2

When Alphys was cleared to go home, she was grumpy. She had to use a cane for balance and had to keep her side bandaged – which meant very little intimacy with her wife, something she wanted after such an horrific event. Brushing with death does that.

Undyne, however, wanted nothing more than to – there’s no other word for this – nurse her.

Alphys was always the one who was the nurturing type; whenever Undyne even got a slight cold, Alphys was there at her side, with cups of soup, ice cubes, and gentle kisses and hugs, help in the shower, and so on. Undyne remembered the myriad times Alphys had done this, and had loved each moment of it.

Now that it was her Alphy who was sick, she planned to nurse her to the fullest.

_Except…_

The moment they got home, Alphys went right to the kitchen, limping, and started making ramen with an angry face.

Undyne stood stunned as her wife proceeded to measure out two helpings and set it to boil.

“Alphy, stop that.” She said it sharply, which made Alphys pause, her back to her, shaking a little from balancing on her cane. “Go lie down. You know what the doctor said. Two weeks _at least,_ okay? Remember?”

Alphys shook her head, her teeth clenched. She didn’t want to rest, or lie down, or do nothing. She wanted to get back to her life, before this mess happened.

The week in the hospital made her angrier and angrier, and made her realise just how weak she really was. If she got back to her normal schedule, she could finally get back to what she wanted, and start becoming stronger.

So instead, she went to the hot fridge and pulled out a jug of water, put it on the counter, and then pulled out their two favourite mugs – all one-handed.

Undyne watched, speechless, now. Alphys was shaking, one hand holding onto her cane so hard that her knuckles were white. She was pale, sweating, but her eyes… They were bright and focused.

_Determined._

Undyne went to her side and grabbed her free hand, pulling it away from the tea canister. Alphys tried to pull it back, but Undyne refused. They struggled a bit over this, until Undyne finally used her full strength and stopped Alphys’s hand mid-air.

Alphys turned to her, her face furious, and Undyne struggled to keep hers blank.

“Let me make tea,” Alphys said angrily, her eyes blazing, but full of tears that she didn’t even notice. “And lunch. Please.”

“You need to rest,” Undyne answered calmly.

“I don’t _want_ to rest,” she answered, trying to jerk her hand away again. “I want to _keep going_. I want to forget this happened!"

“You can’t, Alphy.”

 _“Why?”_ Alphys demanded, her voice breaking. Now she felt the tears _. “Why can’t I just move on with my life?!_ Forget about teaching me fighting! I… I… I'm too weak, too _stupid_ , to fight!"

"Alphy--," Undyne tried.

Alphys swallowed hard, trying to dislodge the lump in her throat. “I never want to go out again!” She laughed, a trace too high to be natural. “I'll stay home, never go out again, and they win, _and I don't care!”_

 _“No!”_ Undyne pulled her away from the counter and moved right up to her. Alphys winced from pain, but it seemed to only make her angrier. “They _don’t_! It’s _not_ right! You said you _wanted_ to learn to fight!”

“What difference would it _make_ , Undyne?! I'll be a hermit, so that nobody gets hurt because of me ever again! It’s what _they_ want! What _everyone_ wants! Hell, even in the Underground…”

She laughed again, this laugh a sound of pure pain, worse than the pain she felt in her ribs and face. “Nobody… nowhere…” she finished, her voice breaking.

Undyne’s face crumpled and cupped Alphys’s face between her hands. “Alphy, _stop._ You’re _someone._ You’re someone _here._ You have a _family.”_

Alphys sobbed, once, unable to control it. “I can’t even protect that family, Undyne. I’m a _loser_. I couldn’t even stand up for _you,_ for _us…”_

The cane fell, and she almost fell to the ground with it, but Undyne grabbed her quickly, and Alphys latched onto her, the sobs taking over, wracking them both.

It was only when the smell of burnt noodles permeated the air that either of them remembered, and there was a momentary pause, in which they both cleaned up the mess (well, Undyne did most of it, but Alphys tried).

“Can’t even ramen right,” Alphys muttered.

Undyne turned to her, grabbed her face, and kissed her. _“There_ you are,” she whispered, her eye bright. Alphys stared at her, confused, until Undyne added, “You were acting like _me_ for a second there. If I wanted to marry _me,_ I _would_ have.”

Alphys couldn’t help it; she smiled a bit, and touched Undyne’s forearms gently with shaking claws. “Except _you_ would've won, Undyne... I-I’m… sorry…”

Undyne responded by kissing her again. “I understand,” she said gently, meaning it. Alphys searched her face and saw it to be the truth, and she relaxed. “Now, let me spoil you, okay? Sit down, put on whatever you want, and I’ll get food and tea, okay?”

Alphys hesitated. “E-er…” She could still smell burnt noodles, after all.

Undyne grinned. “Grillby’s, you _dork.”_

Alphys laughed tearfully, and Undyne gently walked her over to the couch, before calling in the order.

* * *

Alphys was immediately asleep once she had finished eating and they had started watching Mew Mew Kissy Cutie (for perhaps the thousandth time, but Undyne oddly didn’t mind it; she found it adorable, but would never tell anyone except Alphys and Papyrus).

She was surprised that Alphys had fallen asleep at all, sitting up, but with her cheek resting on Undyne’s shoulder and her spare glasses askew, it was obviously real sleep – especially when she started to drool.

Honestly, Undyne was relieved that Alphys was sleeping. It had taken all of the OAVs and a third of the first season to get her that way, and now that she was, Undyne refused to move in case she woke up.

Undyne watched the end of the episode playing, then turned it off, deciding to nod off as well, so that Alphys wouldn’t wake up alone.

* * *

Undyne woke up to a grunt of pain; Alphys trying to sneak away, covering her mouth, her eyes shut tight, before she reached down and grabbed her cane from the floor, shakily using it to get to her feet.

Undyne watched this for about a minute, then said, “Where do you think you’re going?”

Alphys paled, breaking into a sweat, her eyes bright with panic and discomfort.

Undyne immediately lost her mirth and got to her feet, grabbing her before she keeled over. Gesturing hurriedly, Alphys pointed to the washroom, and quickly Undyne steered her that way, before simply picking her up and carrying her there.

 _So much for comfort food,_ Undyne thought, rubbing Alphys’s shaking back slowly as she threw up all of the food she had cheerfully eaten. She knew this was a common symptom with concussions, but she didn’t like to imagine how badly it hurt her wife’s ribs. She got her answer quick enough; Alphys was sobbing, not even trying to talk, and Undyne soothed her gently; with Alphys, she would weather anything.

“Sweetie,” Undyne said softly, once she was sure Alphys was done and cleaned up. “Let’s go to bed. I’ll hold you until you go back to sleep, okay? We'll try to eat again, later."

Alphys nodded weakly. She tried to get up, but Undyne grabbed her again into her arms, and Alphys went limp at once, still crying softly.

Carefully, making sure her steps were soft, Undyne walked back to their bedroom and laid Alphys down on her uninjured side, wrapping her in her usual pile of blankets.

Alphys closed her eyes, burying herself deep in the nest. One hand was reaching out, and Undyne lay down beside her, pulling her blanket-wife into her arms close.

When Alphys was asleep again, Undyne texted Toriel: _“I need your help. Can you bring soup?" S_ he was going to write “I'm scared” but deleted it. _“I'm worried,”_ she wrote instead, _“about Alphys. Please?”_

Toriel immediately replied: _“Give me a half-hour. Frisk and I will be there.”_

Undyne sent, _“TY,”_ before shutting her phone off. She was originally going to ask Papyrus, but then thought against it. His version of soup was less soupy and more water with bits. Plus, he would fuss incredibly and likely keep Alphys up as a result. She knew his heart would be in the right place, but at this point, they needed gentleness, which meant Toriel.

Alphys was fast asleep already, drooling on Undyne’s chest a little, but she didn’t care. She rested her cheek on Alphys’s sweaty forehead, listening to her breathe, relishing in the feel of her claws clinging to her arm, even in sleep.

* * *

When Toriel and Frisk arrived, Frisk went to right to the bedroom with a bowl of soup, while Toriel went to the kitchen to clean it. That was expected, and Undyne was incredibly grateful for it.

“Hey,” Frisk whispered, holding up the huge bowl. Undyne smiled at them, holding a finger up to her lips, and Frisk nodded.

However, it was wasted, because it appeared that the smell of the soup seemed to revive Alphys a bit, as her eyes opened and looked for the source. “Snail…?” she murmured, trying to sit up, before she winced.

Frisk raced to her side, sloshing a bit of the soup in their haste, but Alphys’s eyes were glued to the bowl.

Undyne helped her sit up, and Frisk handed her a spoon, which she took with a shaky hand. “F-Frisk?” she blinked, realising who held the bowl. When they smiled, so did Alphys. “Th-Thanks,” she whispered, before taking the bowl.

Once she started sipping it, Undyne gave her a kiss and said, “I’m going to help Toriel, okay?”

Alphys froze. “T-Toriel?!”

“Frisk, do you mind explaining?” Undyne smiled, before leaving the room. Frisk nodded and sat down beside Alphys, and they began talking.

* * *

 Undyne, the moment she was in the hallway, leaned against the wall and shut her eye.

She had no idea how Alphys did it, how she found the strength to take care of Undyne when she was sick. It hurt so much to see someone she loved so dearly so broken. How did Alphys do it? Even if the worst Undyne ever had was the flu…

Toriel was suddenly at her side, holding up the pot used for the ramen. “You’d be wise to pitch this,” she advised lightly. Then she saw the expression on Undyne’s face. “Are you alright, my dear?”

“How does she do it?” she blurted out, trying to keep her voice soft. “How does she put up with that kind of helplessness? How does she put up with _me?”_

Toriel’s eyes flicked to the bedroom, before she put her arm around Undyne’s shoulders and led her back to the kitchen for privacy. Once there, Toriel tossed the pot into the trash.

Then, she gave Undyne a hug. It surprised her, but suddenly, it was as if the hug broke something, and she started crying, not loudly, but enough to sniffle and whimper a bit. Toriel rubbed her back and stroked her hair gently for a while, until she finally answered Undyne's questions.

“She loves you, Undyne,” was all she said.

Undyne nodded, choking a bit. “That simple, huh?” she laughed shakily.

“Sometimes, that’s all it takes, dear,” Toriel replied wisely. “Tell me; when you look at her this sick, do you feel repulsed by her?”

Undyne jerked away, as though slapped. She took several steps away from Toriel, who looked shocked by the degree of the reaction - until Undyne answered. “Never _. Never._ Why would you ask me such a horrible question?!”

Toriel placed her hand atop Undyne’s head. She smiled. “Exactly, dear. You’ll be fine.”

Undyne stood, speechless, as Toriel gave her head a pat and went back to clean up the mess. Undyne blinked, then helped.

* * *

“I hate this stuff,” Frisk muttered, as Alphys slowly spooned the soup into her hungry mouth. “How can you stand eating snails? Especially giant, fat, disgusting—,”

With a smile, Alphys was staring at Frisk, a snail between her lips, before slurping it down loudly. Frisk went slightly green, but even they smiled at that, which brought a small laugh from Alphys.

“You may be a monster, Frisk,” said Alphys softly between spoonfuls, “But you weren’t raised as one from birth. We learn to love snails at an early age. Well, most of us.” She smiled a bit. “Undyne hates them, too.”

Frisk was silent for a moment before they went on. “Alphys, are you okay? I mean, obviously not totally, but… I don’t understand.”

Alphys paused. “W-what don’t you understand?”

“I know some people of my race are jerks more often than not,” Frisk answered, their eyes angry. “But why didn’t you run? When you knew there was danger, why didn’t you run away?”

Alphys felt a sour feeling in her gut, not related to the soup at all. “B-because…” She bit her lip.

“Did you really think them neighbours or friends, Doctor?”

Alphys shoot her head slowly, looking away. “No. I just… _wanted_ them to be. I wanted it… I-I wanted things to be like they were in the Underground, where words meant more th-than actions, a-and we were _all_ neighbours.”

Frisk was silent for a moment, and Alphys sipped her soup slowly, relishing in how hot it was and how wonderful it felt.

Then Frisk said, “When I came to the Underground, I was shocked by the peace I found there, despite Papi declaring war on all humans. Everyone was so nice, and only sometimes aggressive, but that was rare. I grew up playing games that were like going to places like the Underground, only all I learnt was how to kill and get stronger.”

Alphys nodded; she knew that, too. When she began to learn more about human media and social culture in her desperation to distract herself from her work for Asgore, she had found games as well as movies like this. She found it weird, uncomfortable, almost, but then she figured it was just fiction, so it was probably not a true reflection of humans. She _thought_ , anyway.

Mettaton once said, before he was Mettaton: “Why do they think the solution to everything is hitting? I’m glad I’ve no body. That looks painful.” Later, they would laugh over the irony of that.

“So you can imagine when Mami told me that all I had to do was talk to monsters, play games with them, and the fact that it actually worked…” Frisk looked delighted all of a sudden. “I was so happy. I-I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”

Alphys smiled at them.

“But…” Frisk’s smile faded. “I knew the surface was nothing like that. I grew up here. I knew that violence was the main language here. I mean, not for everyone, but it’s also why humans beat monsters so easily. You were strong, but because you didn’t default on violence, that’s probably what made you lose.”

Alphys stared into her soup, biting her lip. Her hands were shaking.

Frisk was looking at her. “Alphys, you were right, before. Undyne told me what you'd said, and she’s right, too. You need to learn how to defend yourself. Especially here. You plan to stay up here, right?”

Alphys gritted her teeth. “This is my home. I’m not running away, even if I don’t go out again.”

Frisk placed a hand softly on her shoulder. “That’s not the answer, either. You need to defend yourself, your right to be here, because you _do_ belong, you _do_ have the right to be here.”

Frisk’s eyes were dark, now, filled with a light that Alphys hadn’t seen before. Their voice was soft, but Alphys could hear the hurt deep within.

Alphys carefully sipped her soup, so that she wouldn’t have to respond. She didn’t know if she could ever be strong enough to defend herself, let alone learn how.

“If you won’t do it for yourself, Alphys, do it for Undyne.”

She looked up, and saw Frisk looking furious all of a sudden. “Undyne loves you, and would die for you. But if _you_ died for _her,_ she would _kill herself_. Don’t you _get_ that?”

Alphys stared, her mouth open, her entire body cold.

Frisk wasn’t done. “Did you not know that when they hurt you, she went into the group and tried to beat them all up, but with the intent to kill, or be killed?!” Frisk’s eyes filled with tears, and instantly Alphys lost her appetite, her own eyes burning. “That if Papi hadn’t come in time, she _would_ have?!”

“Please, stop...” Alphys begged, shutting her eyes, the tears running down her cheeks and into the soup. “Please… F-Frisk, _please stop…”_

“If you won’t do it for yourself,” they repeated, “do it for Undyne. I know you love her. She loves you.”

_“Please…”_

“Say you’ll do it.”

“I-I _tr-tried!”_ Alphys burst out, slamming the bowl hard onto the nightstand hard. “I tried! I st-stepped forward, I tried t-to stop them, tried to defend her, t-told her to r-run, b-but… I tried to get them to f- focus on me, b-but…”

She was sobbing now, her claws at her chest, something she hadn’t done in a long time.

Frisk’s face was still angry. “But you _couldn’t._ You were too _weak.”_

 _“Frisk!”_ Toriel stormed into the room, furious. “How dare you say things like that? _Apologise_!”

Behind her, Undyne placed a hand on her shoulder, startling her. Undyne was staring at Alphys, seeing her tears, and knew them to be not out of helplessness. No, these tears were from the fact that everything Alphys heard was true, and she knew it, and hated it.

“I-I was… I-I…” she whispered, her claws digging in. Frisk tried to pull her hands away, but couldn’t, so Undyne stepped in, sat down beside Alphys, and did it for her, thankfully before she could break any skin.

Holding them in her hands, Undyne said, “Too weak, love,” she finished sadly.

 _“Why didn’t you run, Undyne?!”_ Alphys cried, turning to her and grabbing her shoulders hard. _“Why?_ I _knew_ they would focus on me. _Why didn’t you run?!”_ She shouted it, her voice breaking, looking desperate, looking as if she wished she could go back and fix it, just by saying it.

“Because, Alphy, I would never, _ever_ leave you. Just like _you_ would never leave _me,”_ Undyne answered gently, placing her hands on Alphys’s wet face, carefully avoiding the bruising along her jaw. “You’re my wife. I will _never_ leave you. Would you ever leave _me_ in that situation? "

 _“No!”_ Alphys sobbed out. “No, no, _no!”_

“Then how can you expect me to do the same, Alphy?!”

“I-I… because I…I’m wor—,”

 Undyne covered her mouth. “No. Look around you.” When Alphys looked at Toriel and Frisk, then back to Undyne, her wife continued. “You are _not_ worthless.”

 Alphys grabbed onto her, sobbing. Toriel and Frisk moved close, Frisk gently rubbing Alphys’s back slowly, feeling terrible but also glad their words meant something. Toriel sat down beside Undyne and hugged both women close.

 “I’ll do it,” Alphys sobbed out brokenly. “I’ll learn. I promise.”

 “Thank you, Alphy…” Undyne whispered, her face full of pain as she, too, broke down.

* * *

Alphys was amazed by Undyne’s care of her.

Whenever she needed something, Undyne was there. She kept the fridge full of soups – snail, leek, spinach, seaweed, all of her favourites – that she supplied with a kiss and a caress whenever Alphys needed to eat but had no appetite.

When she needed to get up to use the bathroom, Undyne at first carried her, but then, as she got better, she helped her walk to it.

When she was too weak to shower, Undyne was there, helping her both to and within, her hands tender and gentle over bruised flesh and teary eyes.

Even when she was physically sick, to the point of having to sleep on the washroom floor because it saved time, Undyne was there, holding her, stroking her back and her head and gently cleaning her face with a loving, kind face and gentle hands.

Alphys fell in love with her all over again, more and more every day, because a deep, dark part of her had expected to lose Undyne over this.

She should have known better by now.

Once, though, Undyne became scared when helping Alphys.

* * *

 In the middle of the night, about a week and a half into her recovery, Alphys had a nightmare.

This wasn’t unusual, as Alphys had nightmares more often than most monsters, haunted by her past at least once or twice a month.

When Undyne woke up, hearing her whimper, she figured it was one of the normal nightmares (if there was such a thing), and sleepily turned to her side to pull her close, stroking from her from her forehead to the back of her head gently, like she always did in these situations.

But that’s when Alphys started struggling against her, which never happened. The usual thing was that Alphys would wake up covered in sweat and gasping, before turning to cling to Undyne in relief.

But this time, instead, Alphys tried to push her away with a cry, before she suddenly started fighting  Undyne, which scared her. Alphys was never aggressive like this, ever, but she fought Undyne, hard, even landing a hit or two before Undyne managed to pin her hands and stop her.

“Alphy!" she cried, even as Alphys tried to kick her away, her eyes half-open but blank and glazed with both terror and sleep. _“Alphys!”_ She rarely used her full name, now, not since they started getting closer, but something was wrong, and Undyne was scared.

“No, _no!”_ Alphys was crying, shaking her head. _“Me_ , not her! _Stop!”_

And that’s when she screamed out, louder than anything Undyne had ever heard. _“Stop killing her! Kill_ me! _Stop!"_

“Alphys!” Undyne shook her, hard, forgetting her still-raw injuries and only thinking about waking her up from this nightmare. Without thinking, she then slapped her wife, on the other side of her face where she wasn’t bruised, and at that, Alphys went limp beneath her, gasping for breath, sobbing.

Undyne was sobbing, too, ashamed she had just struck Alphys, but relieved it worked. She held her still, and Alphys cried, limp, not even fighting back. That was when Undyne knew Alphys was awake.

Carefully, Undyne let go of her wrists, and Alphys's hands instantly went to her chest, proving her right. Undyne hugged her close, wrapping around her like a blanket, and Alphys grabbed onto her, sobbing into her shoulder.

 “Alphy, my god,” Undyne whispered, her voice choked. “What _was_ that?”

 Alphys merely clutched tighter, sobbing harder. She couldn’t talk even if she wanted to. Everything hurt, but her heart hurt the most, the images too real because they _had_ been – almost.

All she could see was Undyne, swarmed by faceless shadows of humans, as Alphys remained paralysed on the ground, unable to speak, unable to even _breathe_ , forced to watch as they murdered her other half, her reason for living, her Undyne…

Something came over her then, something made of instinct that she never knew she could still have. She pulled a bit away and grabbed Undyne’s beautiful face, staring into her eye, before kissing her desperately.

Undyne pulled away after a moment. “Alphy, what was it?” she asked breathlessly.

Undyne understood the feeling, sensing the desperation and the need to prove that they were both alive, but she had to know, she had to understand what was hurting her wife so much to make her do this.

“You’re alive,” Alphys whispered, her voice broken, kissing her again. _“You’re alive.”_

“Yes, I know, but…” Undyne answered, unable to keep from kissing back, her arms reflexively holding her closer. At that, she decided it didn't matter what the nightmare had been.

“I’m here," she whispered. "I’m right here.”

Alphys whispered, her eyes shut, “I’m so glad…” before pulling her closer and kissing her again.

“Please, Undyne…” she murmured against her lips. _“Please…_ I _need_ you, I can’t… _Please, Undyne…”_

Undyne kissed her back, pulling her close and rolling over, so that Alphys was on top of her but no distance was between them, in order to lessen the pain that Alphys may be in.

Alphys _was_ in pain, but she didn’t care. The pleasure of Undyne with her, alive, not dead, and the fact that she was able to touch her, made the pain easy to bear.

  _“Alphy…”_ Undyne whispered, as they clung to each other, unwilling to let go. Alphys shrugged off her nightgown and pushed up against her in reply.

Undyne closed her eyes, unable to keep her breath steady anymore, feeling both heat and yearning hit her all at once, especially when Alphys reached down and stroked her thighs first, then between, her kisses desperate.

* * *

 Wordlessly, they made love through that night, fuelled by both that desperate need and the fear they both shared: the fear of having to face the reality of death – unexpected, violent death – at the hands of a people they only wanted to share their world with.

When Alphys finally fell back asleep, Undyne stayed awake, holding her close, listening to her breathe. She cried, but quietly, gazing at her wife as she slept, her face still a little bruised but relaxed, gentle, calm, even though her hands still held onto one of Undyne's, hard.

The fervour with which Alphys had been with her, that almost panicked need, made Undyne realise how hard it was for Alphys, and not just for her.

Yes, Undyne had had to witness Alphys getting hurt and almost getting killed, but Alphys had witnessed her fighting alone, without being able to do _anything_.

_Which was harder?_

Undyne shut her eyes and buried herself and her wife under the nest of blankets.

She never wanted to find out.

But she would - many, many years later.


	3. Chapter 3

Two weeks later, Alphys was well enough to start her training.

Before giving her any kind of weapon, Undyne started with the basics: working the body, heightening the metabolism, testing flexibility, and so on.

Alphys took to these well, though at the beginning she did wince, then fall, several times. Though she never mastered these techniques, Undyne still decided to move onto combat, because she knew that it wasn’t anything Alphys could help; it was just how she was built.

Next was wooden weapons. They started with hammers, but it didn't work for Alphys's body type, so staffs it was.

Training took place in the living room with all of the furniture against the walls to make a big enough space.

Undyne gave Alphys a staff suited to her size, while Undyne held a wooden version of one of her spears.

Alphys was a little nervous. After all, this _was_ Undyne, the former Captain of the Royal Guard, who had fought her way to the top starting with Asgore, of all people.

Undyne stood calmly before her, wearing her usual work-out clothes, while Alphys, feeling silly, wore similar – though looser – clothes, holding the staff awkwardly.

They had at this point practised hand-to-hand combat as well, and Alphys found she was terrible with her arms, but rather decent with her legs and tail. It was why a hammer hadn't worked, and why she now held a long staff.

“Makes up for your shorter arms,” Undyne had said kindly. Alphys had to agree; she felt oddly long and strong holding one of these things.

“Go first,” Undyne offered, slowly moving into a stance.

Alphys focused like she had been taught, holding the staff firmly with gloved hands (otherwise her palms got too sweaty to hold it properly), slowly dipping into a stance of her own. Without a sound, she lunged, holding the staff before her.

Undyne leaned in and parried it easily with her spear, then shoved her back again.

Alphys got her balance fast enough – something that never would have happened before this training had began – and started forward again, this time swinging the staff to Undyne’s left, trying to catch her off guard.

Undyne again parried, then backed up and took a swing of her own, barely missing Alphys’s nose as Alphys threw the staff up to defend. The two weapons hit, and the feeling shook Alphys so hard her arm went numb, and she dropped her weapon.

Undyne did not. Instead, she came forward again, startling Alphys into moving back and kicking upwards, missing completely. When she spun to try and use her tail, Undyne used the momentum and pushed her to the floor.

Her response was a groan, one that instantly deflated her upon the carpet, eyes shut and panting. Alphys couldn't help it; she still wasn’t used to how much physical activity this required of her.

It had been _weeks_ and it was still so easy to knock her down...

"C'mon, sweetie." Undyne gently poked Alphys's side with the tip of her bare foot. "Up you go, okay? You've gotta keep trying."

"I give up," Alphys gasped out. _"I give up."_

Undyne glared at her, her hands shaking as she held her spear. To hear those words from her, after all that happened, enraged her, not specifically at Alphys, but at what had brought them here.

With not-so-gentle hands, Undyne dragged Alphys to her feet, who went pale at once and swayed a little, one hand over her mouth, the other over her stomach.

Undyne dropped her spear and held her, rubbing her back slowly as Alphys calmed down.

Apparently it wasn't easy for her, either. "I can't do it, Undyne. I can't do it. I-I j-just c- _can't_..."

"You can, Alphy," Undyne answered gently, completely erasing her hard tone from before. "You have to learn how to use your body, because that’s a weapon you always have on you. Okay? At least until you learn magic attacks."

Alphys coughed, a half-retch, half-sob, and again Undyne held her close, rubbing her sweaty back slowly. Resting her cheek on Alphys's head, Undyne glared at nothing, her eye filling, gritting her teeth with hatred at this whole situation. Especially when Alphys started to sob and cling to her.

Once she calmed down, Alphys said, “O-okay. We c-can t-try again.”

Undyne peered down at her, and saw a familiar light in her eyes, that light she'd seen when Alphys asked to learn to fight – the sign Undyne needed to see, to know she was serious.

That light was something more, meant more, than Undyne could ever guess, and she wouldn't truly know what it meant until decades later - and at a crucial moment, too.

But not yet.

With a nod, they separated, and once Alphys was ready, again Undyne gave her the first move.

One of the things Undyne taught her was to use her appearance as deception. Undyne never did, instead using it to intimidate, but that would never work for Alphys. Alphys looked weak, defenceless, and easily brought down. Instead of trying to change that, Undyne taught her to use those things against anyone who automatically assumed them of her. She didn’t think it would work on Undyne, but she knew she had to try, anyway.

Undyne waited, and Alphys waited, as well, holding her staff up before her with narrowed eyes, watching Undyne do the same. The longer she waited, the more Undyne’s own eye narrowed, a frown slowly appearing on her face. Instead of saying anything, though, still she waited, and as a result, so did Alphys.

Until, finally, Alphys started towards her – at a walking pace. Undyne had tensed the moment she started forward, but then seemed to hesitate when she saw how slow Alphys was moving.

Concern flashed over her face. “Alphy, are you hurting? Do you need a second to— _ngaah_!?”

With that cry, Undyne hurriedly threw her spear up to parry off Alphys’s sudden lunge.

Alphys had waited until Undyne began to speak before suddenly steeling herself and rushing forward, her staff slicing upwards.

The two made contact with a loud thudding noise, and for a moment they both struggled, Undyne’s eye wide with shock, Alphys gritting her teeth against the residual pain of her injuries and from the amount of effort she was putting into the attack.

Seeing that Undyne was momentarily stunned, Alphys took a chance and, using her staff, thrust herself back away from Undyne's spear, turning on one heel and swinging her tail toward her legs. She felt a solid thwack to the middle of her tail from Undyne's spear, and winced from the pain, but for some reason, instead of wanting to give up, she got _angry_.

She slipped back, jumping out of Undyne’s range as she came forward, her face serious, now, her own teeth bared. Undyne's eye was rimmed in black, and something was glinting within it, something Alphys didn’t understand, but didn’t have time to wonder at – not yet.

Undyne swung her spear so fast it was a blur, but by some reflex Alphys never even knew she had (indeed, one she _hadn’t_ had until she started training with Undyne), she ducked and threw her arms up to parry the blow with her staff, feeling the impact again in her arms, almost making them go numb, like before.

But this time, she gritted her teeth and forced her weight to her legs, lessening the effect of the blow. With shaking arms, she tried to push Undyne off her, but Undyne was firm, like a rock embedded in more rock holding another rock.

When Alphys looked up at her, she saw that expression again, and now, this close, she recognised it: Complete and utter _awe_.

It surprised her, and she let her guard down, allowing Undyne to kick her legs out from under her at once. It wasn’t a hard kick, and Alphys managed to land just on her backside, but it still winded her briefly, and she had to take a moment to catch her breath, her eyes closed and a hand to her chest.

Undyne moved back slowly, staring at her. In a soft voice, she whispered, “Holy _shit_ , Alphy.”

Alphys looked up in surprise, feeling heat rush to her cheeks, afraid she had done something horrible or wrong.

However, the expression on Undyne’s face was anything but chastising.

Wordlessly, Undyne dropped her spear, knelt before Alphys, and hugged her, hard. She started laughing, her face full of delight, and mixed with the laughter was an edge of tears. Alphys sat there, her staff limp in one hand, confused out of her mind.

“You did it,” Undyne said happily, pulling back to cup Alphys’s face in her hands, and Alphys relaxed. _“You did it,_ Alphy.”

Alphys shook her head, still confused. “I lost. You floored me.”

Undyne shook _her_ head. “But you _fought back_ , Alphy. And you fought back _hard_. I’ve had to train people for _months_ before anything like that happens, at least _that_ smoothly. I just…”

Still beaming, her smile the widest Alphys had ever seen, Undyne gently shook Alphys’s head in her delight. “I’m so proud of you. _I’m so damned proud of you.”_

Alphys stared at her. “B-but… if you’d been a human, I would have lost.”

Undyne snorted. “Are you _kidding_ me? No human would have lasted that long against _you._ I’m…”

Her eye shone, and without another word, she kissed Alphys, deeply, so deeply that Alphys relaxed against her, her eyes closing and her arms going around Undyne.

Against her lips, between kisses, Undyne murmured, “I’m _so proud_ of you, Alphy. I _knew_ you could…”

When Alphys tried to protest, wanting to insist that she still lost, Undyne merely pulled her closer, until quite suddenly she was lying on top of Undyne – who was now also undressing her, something she found she wanted – and maybe even needed – very much.

Needless to say, that lesson ended quite well.

* * *

After that breakthrough, Alphys felt as if she had shed a skin, one of pain, of years of hiding in the shadows, of running away.

It wasn’t like she became a warrior, or as if she became as fit and muscular as Undyne (the only rival in that department was Aaron, and maybe Asgore), but she did find she had some muscle, and had replaced some chub with firmer toning. Her legs became stronger, almost shapely, and she felt better, stronger, though of course she would still always be round in some places and pointy in others; her love of rich food, take-out, and terribly bad snacks would always see to that. However, she found that she didn’t need as much as she used to, which was nice, too.

She eventually learnt to summon magical staffs, like Undyne. Though not as proficient with magic, she still was able to learn, since all monsters could. She started small, not used to magic and more at home with a blend of machine and magic, but with time, she eventually grew her staffs to the size she needed to suit her style. And once she did, she flourished in it, finding it fascinating and amazing, feeling silly she never tried it before.

Undyne spent most of her time staring at her with a rather silly expression, either with a hand on her cheek and a dopey smile on her face, or simply gazing at her from the corner of her eye with a secret smile, one that spoke of other exercises spent after training, a look that usually resulted in a different kind of indoor sport.

The training didn’t stop, however. Though Alphys never floored Undyne, and assumed she never would (she was wrong), still she kept trying. Every time she managed to get even a little close to, though, Undyne would beam at her, looking so happy her eye shone with tears.

Alphys didn’t know it, but Undyne was now falling in love with her all over again this time. She'd always felt that Alphys was a fighter deep down somewhere; she had seen it so many times when she made plans for some kind of mechanical thing, or some sort of new puzzle, or even in new ways to repair Undyne’s myriad magical spears. There was strength in Alphys that most people missed, simply because all they could see was someone weak, someone short and round and, yes, nerdy. But what they didn’t see was that, now, that introvert walked with her head higher, her hands no longer clutched before her, her eyes no longer always looking down or away, but forward, always alert, always watching. She wasn’t paranoid; rather, she was just vigilant. 

And to Undyne, she was _beautiful_. 

* * *

 Soon, it became second nature to her, and one day, she sat down next to Undyne on the couch, paused the game she was playing, and said, “I want to go out.”

Undyne immediately turned to her, giving her her full attention. “Are you sure?”

Through the whole recovery process, as well as the training, Alphys had remained indoors. Despite the new confidence she now had, she still remained skittish, refusing to go out past their back or front yard. Even when Papyrus, sans, or the Dreemurrs offered, still she stayed inside, making up some lie that they all knew was a lie, but allowed, anyway.

But now, here she was, finally ready to go out for real.

Undyne took her hand, and Alphys nodded, her eyes sharp. “I want to go out, Undyne. I want to see a movie, get dinner, maybe dessert, all of it. I want… I want to go out like we used to.”

Undyne smiled gently at her. “Just us, or would you like Papyrus or Frisk to come along?”

“Just us,” Alphys answered immediately, squeezing Undyne’s hand. “I… I don’t want to hide anymore, Undyne.”

“I don’t want you to, either, Alphy,” she agreed.

She turned the game off, then the TV, and stood up, stretching. “Let’s get dressed and go. I have a great idea for a movie.”

She smiled widely, and Alphys groaned in dismay, instantly knowing what that meant: yet another cheesy horror movie by humans.

“Fine,” Alphys sighed in defeat, as Undyne walked with her to their bedroom. “But I pick dinner.”

“Deal.”

* * *

They left the theatre in tears, laughing so hard they had to hold onto each other for balance. They had just left the stupidest movie they had ever seen, an anniversary showing of some cult movie that humans seemed to love but none of the monsters understood why (well, except maybe Mettaton, who had exploded later, _“You have to read the books!”_ ).

Hand-in-hand, they laughed and laughed, but once they calmed, either Alphys or Undyne would quote a line from the movie and set them both off again.

By the time they reached the restaurant (a fancy Japanese restaurant called “Mizuki”, one Alphys adored for their lotus roots and fried tofu), they had barely calmed down, though the human owner, knowing them well enough by now, took it in stride.

“Good movie?” said Lisa, the aforementioned owner, as she got their food ready.

“Oh, god, no,” Undyne snorted. “Terrible! But so hilarious!”

Lisa raised her eyebrows. “Ohh. I know what movie _that_ is.”

Alphys was giggling, occasionally snorting between, which she couldn’t help. She tried to speak, but was laughing too hard, instead trying to try and pantomime it – and failing miserably, which had both Undyne and Lisa laughing.

“May I ask?” said Lisa, as they waited for their food to cook. “Monsters… You’re nothing like the myths, yes?’

“Mm…” Undyne sighed, looking at Alphys, who blinked. She knew that look well.

“No,” Alphys said, smiling. “Not really. We’re actually not that different from you. We’re just not made of the same organic matter, and we have access to magic because it was locked in with us - and therefore away from you. You see…”

And she went on a tangent, explaining quite happily the differences between fact and myth, and Lisa was so interested that she actually sat down with the two of them as they ate to listen to her go on.

Undyne was grinning during the whole time, because she knew Alphys had that effect on people. She had one of those voices that just snagged you when talking about anything, even something mundane. To Lisa’s credit, she was obviously fascinated, listening to Alphys as if she was a student in one of her lectures.

Once they had finished their supper (an hour later), Alphys did the silliest thing and hugged Lisa and thanked her for listening. Lisa laughed and said it was her pleasure.

Hand-in-hand, full of good food and happy conversation, Undyne and Alphys left, on their way home.

* * *

 When they were a few blocks away, Alphys got a text, and so did Undyne. It was the same one: “BEWARE OF HUMANS.” From Papyrus, of course.

Ever since everything happened, his desire for meeting and greeting humans had diminished somewhat, which wasn’t helped when sans was gone for longer periods of time during this, with no explanation.

Undyne had tried, numerous times, to draw him out or have him come over other days, but he refused each time. Alphys was worried, but Undyne knew her friend, and knew he would eventually be fine. He was like rubber; he always bounced back.

Ironically, his message was needed, because as soon as they turned the corner – the very same corner where they had been attacked – there they were.

Perhaps it was foolish to return to the scene of the crime, but Alphys had been firm when Undyne mentioned it: “I’m walking past there and that is that. Th-they can’t win _everything.”_ Oddly, Undyne was satisfied with this, giving her a kiss on the cheek and agreeing.

Now, however, she wondered if it was hubris biting them both in their asses.

“Huh,” said one of the humans. “You were right. It _is_ them.”

“Told you,” said a second one. “I knew they’d be back.”

Alphys tightened her hold on Undyne’s hand, slowly moving in front of her. “W-we have the r-right. We l-live here,” she answered sharply.

“Alphy,” Undyne murmured, “let’s just go.”

“Listen to her, _monster,”_ said the first human, walking forward with a mean smile. “Or don’t you remember what happened last time?”

Alphys’s hand twitched within Undyne’s, and Undyne clutched it close, shaking her head. Alphys didn’t look at her; she was glaring at the one who had hurt her, who had rendered her helpless, who had almost gotten her wife killed.

And for the first time, she realised what it meant to be determined.

All of the years of research, of experimenting, of subjecting others to it, she never really knew what they felt, never knew what it was like. She knew what it was like to need to survive - that desperation, that need - but this? This was different. This wasn’t like that.

This was _power._

Alphys dropped Undyne’s hand and stayed in front of her. Undyne reached for her, but she was already dropping in stance, holding up her hands.

A bright yellow light shone forth, then materialised into a staff in her hands. She was shaking, now, feeling anger and adrenaline boil her blood, but she stood her ground, not making a move, and not backing away.

Behind her, she heard Undyne do the same, holding a spear in her hands, and she was grateful. Undyne understood, and was there to back her up.

The humans were surprised; that was putting it mildly. “Magic,” one said. “I forgot they use it.”

“Because they’re _freaks!”_ the leader answered. “Nothing more! You’re not afraid of them, are you? After we--?”

Alphys lunged forward then, her teeth bared, silent. Unlike Undyne, she never made a sound when she attacked, keeping everything inside, focused on what she was doing and nothing else.

A few of the humans scattered at once, but the three main ones, the chatty ones, merely stepped back, their hands up in surprise, lit by the yellow glow.

Alphys stood before them, mere centimetres from them, but she said nothing, her face, also lit by her staff, was eerily calm, save her eyes: they _burned,_ like something within her was finally kindling to life and setting her blood aflame.

Undyne stood behind her, feeling rare fear course through her, but knowing better than to just leap in and take over. She knew this was something Alphys had to do – but that didn’t mean she had to like it. She was still afraid, her heart racing, her instincts on hair-trigger – but she still waited.

“Get the hell away from me, you _freak,”_ the first human was saying. They reached into their pocket and pulled out a switchblade.

And that’s when Alphys laughed.

It wasn’t the kind of laugh that Undyne made, or really anyone. It was a low, soft chuckle, one she had never made before, but would make again in similar moments as these. It spoke of someone tired of being on the bottom rung of a very tall ladder, and was about to start pushing people off to get to the top.

It set Undyne’s blood on fire as well, because in that moment, she knew she had made her wife a warrior after all.

One of the three humans ran at that, smarter than their friends, obviously sensing something darker in that laugh than the other two.

The one with the switchblade was staring at Alphys, visibly sweating now, but trying to keep their bravado up. The second human had a weapon as well, some kind of weird baton thing, but Alphys merely sniffed at them both, not impressed.

“Uh, kids?” Undyne broke in suddenly. “You may want to run. I know my wife.”

“Shut the hell up, freak,” the first one answered. “We know this _thing,_ too, and we kicked her ass once. We can do it again, glowy shit or not.”

Alphys grinned, her glasses glinting from the light of her weapon, making her look very _megane_ indeed.

Undyne shrugged. “I _did_ warn you.” With a wide grin that was all sharp teeth, she said to Alphys, “Go for it, love.”

With a nod, she did.

She walked slowly toward them, confusing them into staying in one place, just like she had expected. When they looked ready to attack, she beat them to it, swinging her staff toward the second human first, the one with the weird stick.

Shocked, they tried to block it, but before the weapons even made contact, Alphys feinted and moved back to the first human, swinging her tail and slapping the hand that held the blade. With a yelp, they dropped the weapon at once, and Alphys then swung her tail at their legs, hooking it on their knees and dragging them down to the ground.

She turned to the second human, who was staring in shock at their fallen friend, now winded and coughing.

Alphys blinked at them slowly, smiling slightly. The second human dropped their weapon and held up their hands.

But then their eyes moved to the side, the only warning Alphys got, before the first human kicked her legs out from under her. Her weapon vanished at once, and she landed hard on her back, just as winded as they had been.

The first human was already back on their feet, blade back in hand.

Undyne was about to lunge forward, when Alphys sat up and held up her hands, summoned another staff, and parried the blade, sending sparks shooting through the dark night air.

Alphys gritted her teeth, her old injuries jarred to pain from her fall, her concentration hard to hold onto, but she had to. _She had to_. She couldn’t explain it, but she _had_ to win.

Undyne noticed the second human picking up their weapon, and she threw her spear at them, stopping them. This turned out to be too much for them, and they turned and ran, leaving the one human behind.

They didn’t seem to notice their friend was gone. Alphys locked eyes with them, seeing a kind of crazy light there that she hadn’t seen before, save in the wildest of anime. She didn’t even know humans could look like that, look like the very monsters they pretended to be without pounds of make-up upon them. Her arms shook, trying to keep them away, trying to find a window to push them back.

Then she felt stupid, reached up with both legs, and kicked with all of her strength, landing a double blow to their middle and knocking them back.

With a gasp, the human fell, dropping the knife, and Alphys grabbed it, her staff vanishing.

The moment she touched the knife, something white-hot flooded through her, and she surged forward, seeing only red, _wanting_ to see _only_  the red of this human's _blood_ —

Undyne grabbed her arm, stopping her, and she dropped the knife as if it burnt her, the feeling gone the second she dropped it.

The human sat on the ground, terrified, now, having seen something in Alphys that stuck something primal in them.

Alphys felt her heart racing, shame snaking through her, but Undyne placed her other hand on her back, and she struggled to calm down.

“You’re crazy,” the human was screaming at them. _“Fucking crazy!”_

“Says the asshole who insists on _attacking_ monsters,” Undyne snarled back, fed up. “Monsters who want nothing more than to live in peace, you _dipshit.”_

 _“She’s crazy!”_ was the answer.

“Then maybe you shouldn’t have attacked her before?” Undyne replied, this time with a toothy smile.

Alphys stood up taller, glaring, now, shaking a bit from adrenaline and how close it came to being a disaster. “Please,” she said now, in that same low tone as her laugh had been. “Leave us alone. We just want to be happy. Don’t you?”

The human opened their mouth, then shut it, looking confused.

“It never occurred to you before, that maybe monsters want the same things you humans do?” she went on. “That maybe what we want all along are the same things as you?”

The human looked furious now, but refused to look at either of them.

"You can fucking leave now, please,” Undyne concluded, her eye flashing to emphasise this.

The human shot her a glare, then slowly got to their feet.

“And no, you can’t get the knife back,” Alphys added, earning her a glare as well, before the human took off at full speed, shouting something rude but too stupid to record.

As soon as they were out of sight, Alphys turned to Undyne and clung to her tightly. Her eyes were wide open, her whole body shaking, but she wasn’t crying. She was _smiling_ , in shock from it all, unable to believe that she had actually done what she had done, and done it _well_.

Undyne grabbed her tight and lifted her off her feet, earning her a cry of surprise, before she twirled Alphys around with a laugh, one she couldn’t help but join in, her arms thrown around Undyne’s neck and her face buried into her shoulder.

When they both became dizzy, Undyne just held her close, so close that Alphys could feel her heart racing against her own.

And that’s when she felt Undyne slowly graze her teeth down her neck, causing Alphys to shiver and move closer.

“Home, please,” Undyne whispered. Alphys nodded immediately, and they raced home.

* * *

Undyne was laughing. That wasn’t all that unusual after they made love, really, but this kind of laughter was almost maniacal.

Still rather breathless, Alphys turned to her and saw she was laughing so hard she was crying.

“Don’t you think you’re being a little too heavy-handed with flattery?” Alphys said flatly, her eyes narrowed.

Undyne choked on her laughs and fell off the bed.

Alphys thought that rather appropriate, but she helped her back up all the same.

The moment she was back beside her, Undyne tackled her, rubbing her cheek against Alphys’s and laughing again.

“I give up,” Alphys said, though she was smiling and blushing. “What’s the joke?”

“No joke,” Undyne replied. “Just happy. You’re amazing.”

Alphys sighed. “Heavy-handed.”

Undyne snorted and kissed the tip of Alphys’s nose rather messily. “No, you dork,” she replied. “Though _yes_ , but--,” Alphys blushed deeper at that, “—not quite what I meant. Alphy, do you have any clue what you did tonight?”

Alphys smiled a little. “Er, I-I… stood up for myself.”

“You fucking _kicked ass,_ Alphy," Undyne corrected gleefully. “I _knew_ you could do it.”

“I… _I_ didn’t know,” Alphys admitted, looking Undyne right in the eye. “I was sure I was going to lose.”

Undyne blinked, her smile flickering. ‘What?”

Alphys nodded. “I didn’t think I would win. I just… didn’t want to _not_ try.”

Undyne’s smile turned tender, and she gently kissed Alphys on the forehead, now. “That’s usually how it works, dear wife.”

“Really?”

“Yep.” Undyne laid down on her back and pulled Alphys close, getting them both comfortable. “Do you think half the time I expect to kick all the asses before me? Nope. But I _want_ to. And that’s what makes the difference.”

Alphys blinked slowly, the change in position reminding her how exhausted she was, now. “I had no idea,” she admitted.

Undyne smiled at her. “Welcome to warriorhood, my love.”

Alphys blushed and hid her face in Undyne’s shoulder. “Wouldn’t go _that_ far,” she mumbled.

“Oh, I would, and just did,” Undyne answered. “I…” She cleared her throat, and Alphys looked up.

"I was scared, Alphy, when I saw them again. But _you_ … You just walked up and handed them their asses as calmly as the Nice Cream guy. I’ve never seen anything like it, and seeing it from you…” Undyne held her closer, her grip firm. “You’re kind of my hero, now.”

Alphys eyed her for any traces of teasing, but only saw sincerity – of the shy kind, yes, but still sincerity. “Me?” she squeaked out. “To _you?”_

Undyne smiled crookedly, shrugging one shoulder. “Who knew, huh?”

Alphys said nothing, just pulled her close and kissed her, forgetting she was tired at once. Undyne laughed softly against her lips and kissed back, arms around her and pulling her closer.

Alphys hoped she never had to use that power again, but she was glad she had it. In that alone, the fact that she had the ability but never wanted to use it unless as a last resort, was what made her the warrior Undyne saw.

And now, she saw it, too.

**The End  
**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, Mizuki's and Lisa are real. If you are ever in Mississauga, get thee to Mizuki. And ask for lotus roots. They're amazing.
> 
> EDIT: As of 2017, Mizuki is no longer in business. I'm heartbroken by it, but at least it's immortal, now, in this story. I miss you, Lisa :(.


End file.
